This month went from being a good one to a rough one. I had my six month follow up appointment with my nurse. My nurse took her time with me an answered all of my questions about my medicines and about some other concerns I had. What I really appreciated about this appointment was one of my friends was able to join me via telephone to help me with my notes. Believe me I had a lot of them. 😊 All in all, it was a pretty good appointment.
I started working on my continuing education class. The class’s focus is how to write a full-length memoir. My prayer is this memoir helps others and reaches those who do not know Christ as their Savior. I already have an idea of where I want to start and end my memoir. I just need to learn how to make these ideas flow.
God certainly has shown me peace this month. Two weeks ago, my grandpa and I had a disagreement. I was ready to leave and move out of state because of this. However, after a few days of this my grandpa and I decided to let our differences go and just move on with life. I would like to thank everyone who has stepped in to support me during this difficult time.
Another way that God has shown me peace is he is teaching me that there is power in prayer and patience. The past two nights I have gone to bed angry. The first night I was angry because I am nervous about my upcoming vacation, and I fear I will be judged by my looks. Even though my friend has assured me that I will not be judged even if I do not meet my weight loss goal, I feel like I have been failing for the past two weeks. I have not been walking and I feel like I am overeating. I constantly feel like I am craving sweet things. I really am going to have to push myself next month to reach my goal. Then I felt like I could not reach any goal at all. With the way the world is constantly changing I do not know if I should set goals and work towards them or not. This feels especially true when it came to financial goals. I really want to get a debit card so I can start paying for some of my own things, however I am still researching the one that is right for me. All I could do was turn my anger over to God and ask him to soften my heart. The next night I was angry because my friend was having some technology issues with his Iphone. I was able to teach him some things last March, but I was not able to teach him everything. Because he has not been able to learn how to troubleshoot yet I felt guilty that I was unable to teach him this yet. I once again went to God and asked him to soften my heart. I was able to share my heart with my friend today. He gave me reassurance that he was the one that has to learn these lessons and I did nothing wrong.
Lastly God’s goodness is once again all around me. I feel this month I need to take a step back once again and look at the goodness that God provides. I have friends that have become like family to me, that truly listen and care for me and my wellbeing. I have been able to go through my belongings, and I plan to donate to those less fortunate than I. I am doing well with my Braille classes, and I have two book clubs that I can enjoy. Yes, God is good all the time. Even when the month has been challenging.